I'm finally getting around to exploring another answer to the question: birth order. According to Wikipedia, "birth order is often believed to have a profound and lasting effect on psychological development."
Technically I'm the second of four children.
But here's the thing: I believe I have played the role of oldest, middle and youngest child in my family. And if there is any credibility to the birth order theory, it's no wonder I'm a little screwy sometimes!
I am nearly three years younger than my brother, the oldest child. He was a bit of a societal dropout. I was the first one to get a driver's license, the first to get a job, the first to graduate from high school, the first to leave home. I have a distinct memory of hearing my mother--in an effort to expand his self-sufficiency--offer to pay him a dollar if he'd break an egg into a pan. It was hard for me to understand why I couldn't have a dollar because I already knew how to do that. (He eventually did get a license, left home and learned how to break an egg.)
I am nearly nine years older than my next younger sister. Which meant that I was the baby of the family for all of my formative years and beyond. I didn't have to be a responsible older sibling. I didn't have anyone getting into my stuff. I didn't have to compete for attention with someone cuter than me.
But as soon as my sister was born I became a middle child. With an older brother in the throes of puberty and a needy infant, I felt an unspoken responsibility to lay low and not cause any additional stress in the family (not that I was always successful!).
Then to top it all off, my youngest sister was born when I was fourteen and I became a second mother! I'm not complaining--we had a lot of fun together! But I do remember lots of diaper changes and babysitting.
A possible explanation for thinking I need to be all things to all people? The kind of thinking that can make a person crazy?
4 comments:
Margy, we're ALL a little screwy at times. LOL! I think your childhood, at times full of all three types, makes you a well rounded adult. A great niece and friend, sister, wife and mother! Love ya' just the way you is.
Ah, John. I love the spin you put on it! Well rounded. That does sound much better than neurotic! Love you too!
Wow, this is thought-provoking. You make some great points. Which role is your fave?
Very interesting seeing I know all you, and your parents. I talk to my brother about growing up and I think it is so crazy we have the same parents, and lived in the same house but have TOTALLY different stories and feelings about how life was at 412 Main Street Acton... He was the golden child I was the screw up, but that has changed q bit:)
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